Friday, October 17, 2008

My email can beat up your email

I'll admit it: I was already a little crabby when I walked into work this morning. My kid was up at 3:30 am and it took an HOUR to get him back down. Not really sure what was going on there...maybe a new tooth? Who knows. Babies are weird. Anyway. Where was I? Oh, right- I was crabby.

I grabbed a cup of coffee (usually I'm decaf but today was a half-caff type of morning), settled in and checked my email. Innocuously placed among campus wide announcements and cute doggy pictures (thanks, Ma) was an email from a former co-worker. Someone I thought I got along with. Someone I KNOW I share certain political views with.

At first glance, I assumed it was probably just a greeting (Heyhowareyouitsbeenawhile type of a thing) or a silly forward (FRIENDZRAWESOMEforwardto10friendsorsufferHORRIBLEBADLUCK) but I was wrong: What was lurking inside this email almost caused me to spew half-caff with half n' half (say THAT 5 times fast) all over my keyboard. This email was the most vile, offensive, completely ridiculous drivel I've ever received in a personal email. And while I hesitate to post too much of it here because it is SO INCREDIBLY RIDICULOUS AND OFFENSIVE, I'll give you just a small idea of the content.

It was entitled "Why I vote Democrat" and included such gems as:

I'm voting Democrat because I believe people who can't tell us if it will rain in two or three days, can now tell us the polar ice caps will disappear in ten years if I don't start riding a bicycle, build a windmill or inflate my tires to
proper levels.


And:

I'm voting Democrat because it's alright to kill millions of babies as long as we keep violent, convicted murderers on death row alive.

And this one:

I'm voting Democrat because the government knows how to raise children better than parents do.

It went on and on and on. If printed out, it would be 4 pages. 4 PAGES! I'll have to admit: My first instinct was to fire off some sort of scathing reply. Something to the tune of:

I'm voting Republican because I’d rather completely destroy the landscape, the ozone layer and my own lungs than drive a smaller car or get off my fat ass and ride a bike or recycle a can.

Or:

I’m voting Republican because I in no way understand the issue of Reproductive rights. I've never known anyone with preeclampsia (and don’t even know what that is). I’m “Pro-Life” but do not want any of my money to go to help lower the rate of unwanted pregnancies, help single mothers make ends meet, take care of special needs children,or provide health insurance for the millions of uninsured children in this country.

I didn't of course. And I never would. I just ignored the email, and went about my work while secretly fuming. I know I should just shrug it off. There are a lot of dipshits out there right? But I hate it that this sort of baiting bullshit circulates and that people actually buy it. As strongly held as my beliefs and views are, I would never circulate or forward anything like the stuff that was in this email. And even if you have different opinions than someone else, especially someone you KNOW personally, get a long with, go drinking with...stay respectful, you know?

How do you respond to stuff like this? Especially if it comes from people you are close to? Just ignore it? Rise above?

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