No S. And 300.

Holy shit, this is my 300th post. I'm kind of sorry I don't have something epic/splendid/affecting to write. But that wouldn't really be in keeping with the spirit of this blog, now would it? ;-)

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In my on/off quest to get/stay healthy and fitting into all my clothes, I recently came across this diet.

Now, first off, the word "diet" is an immediate turn off to me. I am simply not interested or motivated to count calories, omit entire food groups, count points or anything else like that. I know those things work for some people and kudos to you if they do, but for me? Not so much. I like food. And cooking. And we don't eat crappily...we don't eat fast food, we do lots of fresh veggies and fruits and whole grains but also BUTTER and CHEESE and PASTA and mmmm...I'm hungry.

Maybe that's why this whole "No S" thing makes sense to me. The entire thing is, well, pretty easy. And really, just common sense. From the website- the diet in a nutshell:

"There are just three rules and one exception:

• No Snacks
• No Sweets
• No Seconds

Except (sometimes) on days that start with "S""

And that's pretty much it. You can click the link and keep reading if you want. Not everything the author writes is all the politically correct or sensitive to people of all sizes, but the core idea makes sense to me. No snacks. No sweets. No seconds. Except on days that start with "S", which would be Saturdays, Sundays, and Special Occasions.

As you'll notice, if you click the link, the author has penned a book, but pretty much lays everything out on the website. Its intriguing! In fact, he deliberately makes the point that he feels spending money on fancy diet crap is silly.

Since I (all to easily) fall into the habit of medicating my 3:00 pm doldrums with snacks and I'm TERRIBLE about helping myself to seconds (sometimes thirds) because "it will never taste as good as it does right now!,"I like how the No S idea doesn't say you can NEVER snack, NEVER have seconds (or thirds, heh). It just provides some parameters for this behavior. I'm gonna try it. I'll let you know how it goes. I have a sneaking suspicion that it might be harder than it sounds...

Inspriations

As a variation on a "My Favorite Things" post, I thought I'd share some stuff, people and music that I'm crushing on right now. This time of year, especially, I find myself needing just a little inspiration to stay motivated- not only for just the day to day stuff but also for the extras (knitting, journaling, getting dressed in the morning...) This shit is getting me through, people.

First up, Bill Murray and more specifially, this movie. I love it so much.

He was recently on an episode of Anthony Bourdain's No Reservations (another crush) and it was so fun to see the two of them together, discussing food and other things...Sigh. Think I just might have a thing for older, ruggedly handsome and darkly humored men? Me either. :-)

Also, I'm still totally crushing on First Aid Kit (link to their MySpace)...I know the band name is silly but 1., English is not their native tongue and 2., they are so young! But OMG look at this gorgeous video! And I love, love LOVE how their stong, soaring voices blend together.




And, lastly, check out these adorable handpainted cards on Etsy...This broken hearted one's my favorite (of course):

I'm making a concerted effort to create more right now...I feel like its a great way to pull myself up by my bootstraps and dust the dirty old snow off my pants. I'm trying to journal more, do more art projects with my little dude and brainstorm re-decorating ideas for the house.

That, paired with a generous dose of Crown Royal might just get me through :-)


What's getting you through the hum-drums of late winter?

Its a Bummer

We took a couple days off this past weekend to spend some time with the in-laws in the wilds of central Wyoming, otherwise known as the small town my husband grew up in and in which I lived for a very short time. (Long enough to meet him, anyhow. )

It was relaxing and badly needed- a long, quiet car trip though beautiful frozen vistas of partially snow covered sagebrush, deep ravines and craggy rock paired with an icy, crystal blue sky... a couple days of sledding, food, and reading (yay Kindle!) and then a day at home to catch up on shopping, laundry and rest. And some more reading. Heh. I should make a note to always take a President's Day/Valentines Day break because it restored some sanity I wasn't even aware was missing.

After 4 days off the grid, however, its good to be back, catching up on blogs, twitter, news...I love reconnecting with my internet buddies. And the best part? Its Wednesday already! :-)

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In other news this awards season, I am apparently up for the Worst Mother Ever award (yet again). The little guy has had a nasty red bum for the past week and a half or so. We tried everything that usually works on diaper rash: blow drying/air drying, keeping it super clean, good cream, even cutting out acidic foods for a couple days...NOTHING worked. If anything it kept getting steadily worse.

Finally, yesterday, I broke down and took him into the pediatrician. $80 later and we have a diagnosis of Strep. In his butt. The Dr. said its super painful and not very common although he does see it a couple times a month (that's not common?) where the strep bug bypasses the tonsils and settles in the, uh, other end.

Of course, I felt horrible that I hadn't immediately noticed that something was really wrong but he reassured me that we did everything right and yada yada yada...Still, mom-guilt has set in and Little O can pretty much get away with murder at the moment because I feel so bad about abusing his poor, sore behind with creams and blowdryers all week.

Live and learn, I s'pose.

My Favorite Things

The bad: Its fucking freezing here (of course) (still): -2 degrees this morning on our way to work/daycare. Additionally, I live with a sick, complaining Husband. And also a sick, whiny, fragile toddler. I'm also still dealing with the emotional weight of my brother and his partner's miscarriage, my rift with my other brother, friends who seem to be disappearing down the rabbit hole of booze/drugs and/or on the verge of losing partial custody of their kids because they just can't seem to parent responsibly....sigh.

Its been a while since I've done a My Favorite Things post...but I need a little pick me up and thinking about things I'm loving is one of the best ways for me to pull myself up and dust off my pants.


First up, is my new toy: the Kindle 2.

Yeah, yeah. You've all heard about it. But truly. For a prolific reader like myself, it is kind of totally fantastic.

(Disclaimer: I am in NO WAY being compensated for reviewing this. I paid full price for the bastard.)

I've gotten over the buyer's remorse-type feelings that I always get when I spend any large amount of money on myself and have really started enjoying it. I've downloaded a bunch of free classics that I can't wait to read/reread: Sherlock Holmes, Dracula, Jane Eyre...and there are lots more where those come from.

I purchased one book, just to try out the whole shop/download wirelessly thing and I've gotta say, it was pretty smooth. Also, my custom made cover arrived just a day after the Kindle did and it turned out so cute! I'm officially smitten.

And while this thing won't completely replace books for me- If I read something that I truly love and know I will want to reread/share I'll probably eventually purchase it in hard copy form. But for guilty pleasure reading (which I, ahem, do a lot of), I just don't see how this thing can be beat.


When I'm able to tear myself away from the Kindle for a moment, I'm also really loving the simple things:

Chamomile tea.

Walking home for lunch in the bright (cold) sunshine.

Long, rambling phone calls with friends.

Snuggling with my kid under the down comforter while the wind whistles outside.

Good TV: like this, this or this.

Thinking about Spring, as far away as it might be.

What things are you loving right now?

Please let this be the end of the tunnel...

Sorry that last post was such a downer. They were thoughts that needed processing- worries that needed articulating. After writing about it and talking with friends, I'm in a much saner place regarding my son's possible debauchery in a decade or so. (I never said I wasn't kind of nuts :-) He's only 2, and I'm a good parent, dammit. It will all be ok. Right? Right.

Anyhow. Its been a horrible week. We found out a couple days ago that my little brother and his partner miscarried and lost their baby. She was 9 weeks along. The pregnancy itself was unexpected but we were all excited and already embracing this new little life. The miscarriage came at a terrible time (well, what time wouldn't be terrible): While they were in the middle of moving. So they are stuck in a hotel, a rental truck wracking up charges and she is in a lot of pain.

I feel so helpless sitting here, hundreds of miles away. They are having to go through their own hell right now and it sucks that I can't just make everything ok for my little brother. We've been in touch and I've let them know that we're "here for them" but what does that really mean when you're in Wyoming and they are elsewhere?

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(Warning; This next section might be TMI for the squeamish)

In other news, not so serious news, we had an AWESOME experience of P.I.B. last night. What's that, you ask? Poop In the Bath! Whee!! I was sitting on the (closed, thanks) toilet last night chatting with my mom about the little brother stuff while Otto luxuriated in the bath tub. Suddenly he stood up, started crying and yelling "Poop in the bath, Mama! I'm sorry!"

Sigh.

After assuring Otto that is was OK and not to be sad-" it was just an accident!", I yelled for the Husband to come help and together we awkwardly held Otto up while pouring clean water over him. Then I fished the turds out with rubber gloves and sanitized the tub best I could.

We all got to bed a little late, so I slept in and skipped my work out.

It totally rocked! Yay parenting!!!

(I'm sure this happens to everyone else too. Feel free to share your own P.I.B. stories in the comments. Whee!!)

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Lastly, some fun news that I feel kind of guilty about- I'm getting a Kindle!! I've wanted one for a long time and we are getting a big enough tax return that the Husband suggested I go for it. (Mainly because I think HE wants a new acoustic guitar and doesn't want to feel guilty about it, heh.) We're still going to have plenty to pay off some bills (we're still paying for my varicose vein surgery I had in September and for Otto's broken arm) and replenish our savings a bit.

Anyhow, I've been perusing the free download-able content at Amazon and am super stoked: Jane Austen, Lewis Carroll, Conan Doyle...lots of classics for free or cheap along with cheap bestsellers (9.99 on most)...but. Even though the Kindle is now $100 cheaper it still seems so expensive...it feels so indulgent to be spending that much on myself. Not totally in a bad way, I guess.

Also, I'm ordering a custom cover from Etsy (check out this shop!) which has been as fun as anything. I DEFINITELY need a cover because HELLO? Two-year old, puppy, tendency to drop things...And the proprietor of above shop is willing to do Velcro AND corner tabs for me, ensuring a very secure attachment of Kindle to cover. After much rumination, I chose the fabric below by Michael Miller for my cover and placed the order today. Squee!




So that, in a large nutshell is where I'm at. Grieving, cleaning up poop, (hopefully) regaining some sanity, and looking forward to ebooks. Its not all bad, but I'm ready for Spring in more ways than one.

I'll leave you with a favorite song of the moment:




"Love is tough. Time is rough....on me."

An Other Kind of Day

This post has been flopping around in my head for a while now, like a caught fish. Or clown shoes. I finally have a few minutes to try to release it onto the page but now that I actually try to write, I'm having a hard time formulating the words for what I want to say. So this may read like a poor (and woefully less talented) womans' Virginia Wolf-ian stream of consciousness...But here' goes...

Lately, I find that one consistent thought keeps returning to the forefront of my exhausted brain:

I hope that I can parent my child to be smart. Smarter than me.

And I'm not really talking about book smart. I am book smart. I loved school, succeeded at it...graduated college with honors and all that. So yeah, of course I want my son to be book smart but I'm not really worried about that, per say. Whether he succeeds in school or learns some other way, I know he's a smart kid.

I'm worried about the other kind of smart, what some might call street smart. Or maybe common sense. Its just that I did so many very, very stupid things when I was younger. Dangerously stupid things. And just thinking about them now has this non-believer crossing herself and looking heavenward.

An example:

When I was 15, I had this great friend named Cori. She was everything I wasn't - extroverted, sassy, confident, knew all kinds of fun make-up tricks and had "lots" of experience with boys. Me, I'd had a couple boyfriends but never made it past heavy petting, and was pretty self-conscious about my body and appearance in general.

She lived in a huge, mostly empty refurbished funeral home on main street with her uncle who had bought the place 'for a great price' and decided to live in it. We spent hours in her room (formerly the viewing room for the funeral home) putting on blue mascara, listening to Lenny Kravitz and talking about who was boning who in high school.

One night, all dolled up, we were walking on main street and a guy we'd never met, in some kind of 80's-tastic douchebag car (a Camaro maybe?) pulled up and asked us if we wanted to go to a party.

We went with him. We literally let him pick us up like a couple of teenage hookers.

Idiots.

It turned out to be nothing really. He drove us out to a trailer park where some people were drinking Sex on the Beach's (first time I'd ever heard of that) and listening to metal. Cori flirted and swayed her hips and blinked a million times a minute. I sat on a couch and swirled the ice around in my drink and tried not to stare at the couples in matching pocket-less wranglers making out. We stayed for a while, then once our 11:00pm curfew approached, politely asked for a ride back in to town, which some girl there was glad to do as she was leaving as well.

So it all turned out fine. But what if it hadn't? I mean, how fucking stupid is it to get into a strange dude's car like that? I know now that that same, bad decision could have lead to sexual assault or any number of other things. And for many young people, it has and does.

I did all sorts of other stupid shit as an adolescent and young adult and I am frankly amazed now that I came through it with so little scarring. Maybe I watch too many movies or read too much Newsweek, but I can't help but imagine all the horrible stuff that could have happened. Of course my parents had done all the requisite 'stranger danger' training but apparently I just didn't give a shit? I honestly don't know what I was thinking.



And, as a parent now, this (I think common) teenager-y of inability to access any sort of common sense scares the holy living shit out of me.

How do I do it? How to I grow an independent, intelligent boy with common sense? I know that he has to grow up and make his own mistakes and that I can't shelter him (and I don't want to). But at the same time, I want him to know that one bad decision can change everything.

There are reasons I've been thinking about this lately, reasons that I don't feel totally comfortable writing about here. And maybe it seems silly to be thinking about this stuff when my kid is only 2 years old. But I know that what I do NOW as a parent, will have an impact on who he becomes THEN. And while some days I feel like I'm rocking the mom gig pretty hard, on others, I'm terrified I'm going to screw it up. Today's an 'other day.'

Haiti

All the coverage on Haiti is so devastating, so heart wrenching. What the people there must be going through, I really have no basis for understanding. We've given what we can, and will do more if the opportunity arises. But seeing these images, reading the stories- it produces a feeling of helplessness and sadness and I wish there was a way to just make everything ok again for the thousands of people who are dead, injured, separated from loved ones...

You've all seen by now, I'm sure that there are countless ways to help monetarily. But just in case, here's a link to a list of charities.

I'm not a praying person but Haiti is definitely in my thoughts. I just keep wondering about mothers separated from children, husbands searching from wives, people still buried under rubble...Wishing there was more to do than just giving money, although from what the media is saying, there is of course a huge need to get aid organizations mobilized and things like water and medicine to the people that need them and money helps do that. Still. Ugh.