Questions

1.  Who's genius idea was it to have 'round table staff meetings' at 9 AM on MONDAYS?  KILL.

2.  How is my heater clicking on in the middle of motherloving JUNE supposed to keep me from wallowing in dank hole of self-pity and depression because?  It feels like IT IS NEVER GOING TO BE SUMMER.  

3.  How much caffeine will it actually take for me to feel like a human today?  1 cup of coffee?  2?  37?

4.  How are you?

So good...so good...I got you!

 I started counting calories and upping my daily workouts a bit in the beginning of April.  I didn't really have a specific goal in mind, weight or size-wise,  I just want to be...fit.  I wanted to feel good and be able to do stuff.  Like run a 5k.  And hike.  And do push-ups. 

And here, for the first time, are some stats.  Please don't think that I'm bragging or bemoaning or anything like that.  I'm just stating what's going on with my body and certainly not passing judgement on anyone else's.  Health certainly doesn't correspond with size!  I just wanted to document what's up here because 1. I suck at keeping a journal...this blog is pretty much it most weeks, and 2. it's motivating to put this stuff out here for you guys...keeps me honest :-)

At 5ft, 8 in. tall, my starting weight, back in April was 160 lbs. and I was pretty consistently wearing a size 12.    I was already excersising moderately 4-5 times a week (ususally alternating days of 30-60 min. of cardio or strength training).  I don't feel like I was out of shape, really, but I wasn't watching what I was eating (or drinking)...at all and I wasn't pushing myself in my workouts.   I could only do 2-3 push-ups before I was cheating and going down on my knees. 

Since April, (I think I've mentioned this before, heh) I've been journaling every. single. thing. I put in my mouth here which might sound a bit obsessive but its actually kind of fun. And addicting.   After a few days of doing this, I learned (duh) that I could eat more of stuff that was better for me, i.e.,  fruits and veggies and non-fat dairy as opposed to cookies, breads, fatty delicious Tillamook cheese, etc.  

For example, a huge salad, complete with spinach, avacado, baby carrots, tomato, cucumber, 2% monterey jack and salsa and even a little bit of light sour cream for lunch was under 300 calories!  And filling!  And super delicious! Add a couple of homemade masa corn tortillas and I'm stuffed and in at about 400 calories.  Compare that to a lunch I might have had pre-calorie obsession of turkey sandwich with the before mentioned delicious full-fat cheese, mayo, and much smaller serving of veggies and maybe some chips and a piece of fruit and there is a HUGE difference, calorie wise.  And overall feeling-wise.  I've discovered that I just plain feel better when I eat the salad... the turkey sandwich/chips lunch would tend to make me kind of heavy and bloated or something.  I just don't need that much food.   But I would eat it because it was there.  And because that's what my 230 lb. 6'2" husband was eating.  See if you can spot the error. 

As of this weekend, I'm at 148 lbs. and fitting into 8-10's, depending on brand.  (We went to Old Navy, Target, and Macy's over the weekend to get the husband some shorts and I tried on pants just for shits and gigs.)

More importantly, I have achieved my bigger goal of feeling good.  I can now comfortably run 4 miles.  I can do this grueling workout with relative ease.   I can do "real" pushups (not a lot, but even 10-15 push-ups off my knees is better than where I started!)   I have energy and a certain clarity of mind that I feel is directly related to increasing the intensity and duration of my work-outs. 

My shoulders and arms look...dare I say...muscular.  Ish.  And my legs are firmer.   My collar bone stands out a bit.  I'll probably never lose the little "I've had a baby paunch" around my middle, but that doesn't bother me because HELLO I created a person out of thin air and housed and fed him there for 9 months.  My little tummy is a fucking badge of honor and honestly, I want to keep a little roundness there to remind me of how connected we once were and of the amazing shit a woman's body, MY body is capable of.  

Most of this shit may be totally obvious to you and you very well might be sick of reading about it.   But.  This journey so far has been a huge adjustment for me and kind of all-encompassing.  I've had to change the way I see exercise (fun! and challenging! and stress relieving instead of a boring chore that has to be completed) and how I see food (fresh, delicious fuel to be savored as opposed to whatever crap is there to shove into my pie-hole.)   I'm now planning on running a 5k in 2 weeks.  And I'm totally excited.  I'm also going to walk a half-marathon on July 4th.  Because I can do it.  And because its in a beautiful place and will be fun. 

I feel good, you guys.

Keep on the Sunny Side

You know that kind of sick that makes you feel like you're slightly high?  Or drunk?  That's what I have right now.  A doozy of a summer cold complete with sinus pain, congestion, googly eyes and foul temper.  Although that last symptom might just be a personality trait.

I've been sucking it up and going to work anyway because its our busiest time of year and my desk is awash in a sea of white paper and post-it notes.  That, and I was cursed with this stupid thing called a 'work ethic' and actually feel guilty calling in sick when I know that I have a shit-ton to do.  Go figure.

In other news, we're totally potty-learned (taught?...I dunno...I just don't like the word "trained") with only a few (pee) accidents here and there when he gets distracted.  It was a MUCH less arduous process than I thought it would be and all I can think is that we just caught the right little developmental window and he was ready.

Now to work on weaning.  Or not. I have conflicting feelings about it, but mostly feel like I'll be ready very soon.  The little dude really only nurses now once a day (at bedtime) but asks to nurse if he wakes up in the middle of the night, hurts himself or is sick.  So its not like I'm whipping 'em out constantly or anything.  I'm sure that it will evolve like everything else and I should just enjoy these last nursings because Otto is probably going to be an only child.  Right? Right.  And now that I think about it, with me being all nasty-sick, he's getting my antibodies so if he gets it, it should be a much milder illness.  So...upside.

The weather here has finally turned the corner into something resembling spring/summer with highs hovering around 70 degrees and leaves/blossoms popping out on trees.  We've got cherry tomatoes, daisies, bell peppers, and lettuce (that we started indoors from seed) now in containers outside on our front stoop.  We'll see how they get on, as the nights are still a little chilly.

We also started sunflowers and I planted them on the south facing side of the house, so hopefully they'll take off and give us some nice tall flowers later on this summer.  Growing up in Kansas, I always loved watching how the sunflowers took pains to turn their faces toward the sun throughout the day.  Isn't funny how nature kind of knows what's up if you just pay attention?

Weekend Redux

We were SO overdue for a weekend like this:  sunny, warm(ish), 3 WHOLE DAYS LONG...sigh.  It was awesome.  We hiked, we biked, we grilled, we socialized, we cleaned...I even went to the movies.

On Saturday, we hiked  and it was probably Ruby's best day in her entire 10 month life.  We let her off the leash and you could tell at first she didn't really believe it.  She stayed very close and kept looking at her leash in my hand, like "This has to be a trick, right?  Well I'm not falling for it!"  After a while, though, she got more comfortable and by the end of the 3 miles, we were whistling for her every few minutes to come back in sight.

At the end of the trail, there's a little creek with a waterfall and we all stopped there for a snack and Otto and I even stuck our bare feet in the icy mountain water.  Bracing.  Ruby went nuts, especially when another family with another doodle joined us.  It was the dog version of Clash of the Titans as the two dorks played and wrestled in the creek and then up on the dusty hillside.

We were so glad Ruby's been recently shaved because the other doodle?  Who still had all its crazy hair?  A huge mess.  HUGE.  Once Ruby was dry, I was able to brush her out to where she looked pretty much clean.  
Right after the Epic Doodle Battle:

Other than that, we got a lot of chores done (washed both cars, and all our bikes, cleaned, did some planting), grilled some delicious food , (I know that recipe says to broil the chicken, but it was SO GOOD grilled.) and just generally enjoyed eachother's company.

As always, though, I didn't have enough time to do EVERYTHING I was hoping to get done (so sorry, picnic table that still needs to be sanded and sealed) but we did a pretty good job cramming a shit-ton of activities into three days.

ETA:  Oh! Oh!  I forgot the Breaking News from this weekend...my son now poops in the potty!!!  You're welcome.

Yep.

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is hard business. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.

— Rudyard Kipling

Progress, Not Perfection

Accomplished this weekend:

1. Progress on potty learning: Boy is consistently wearing undies/peeing in the potty. He asks for a diaper to go no.2, which is totally fine with me. Just that he's A, realizing that he needs to go and B, making arrangements to do it comfortably is awesome. If you think about it, potty learning is a HUGE new skill for a child who has been diapered. Not only is he learning to pay attention to his body's cues for the first time, his brain now has to learn to be two places at once: on the task at hand (playing, drawing, walking, whatever) but also paying attention to his bladder/bowels. Kind a huge step.

2. Kitchen was taken apart, cleaned, sanded, painted, and then put back together again. It was a big project but finished in less than a day, thanks to the...

3. In-Laws. Who stayed with us all weekend. They were so sweet to drive here and help us paint and buy us dinner and take the boy/dog for walks and etc. etc. I am so petty that I always end up being annoyed by little things when they are here (treating bathtime like a spectator sport, eating noisily, asking mildly invasive questions), but I'm also able to see the big picture: we have folks who adore us, support us, and just generally help us out with anything.

4. Sleep. Yeah, not so much.

EXACTLY.

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