I Need to Vent About This...

So I'm having an issue with my right knee.

Ever since I started running seriously, my right knee has been a little wonky.  I've had runner's knee and general soreness come and go but never anything more than just an annoying ache that would go away after a while.

But now I'm kinda scared that I've done something to really damage it and it has me sad and kinda worried.

I did an 8 miler about a week and a half ago, then a 6 miler two days later.  Then two days after that, I went for what was going to be an easy 5 and had to completely stop at about 4 miles because my knee was just...done.  Not just sore- it was a sharp, arresting pain just below my knee cap that literally stopped me in my tracks.

I took 4 days off (from running- I cross-trained), then ran 3.5 miles this Monday- my knee still hurt, but I was able to modify my stride to keep it from doing the sharp-totally-shutting-me-down pain that it had done the run before.  I can feel that its still injured- it hurts to go up stairs and if I even step wrong while walking, I get that sharp pain- like there's no cushioning in there at all.

This has got me so, so down.  You wouldn't think that a little thing like having a hurt knee would really affect your mood, but its keeping me from having good runs which are KEY to my mental well-being.  Also, I was planning on running a 10K in two weeks in Missouri when we go to visit my folks.  Frankly, I can't see that happening now, if I can barely limp through 4 miles.

I've been icing, taking anti-inflammatories and I'll go get a knee brace to immobilize it for a few days.  I just want to feel better so I can get my road therapy in.  I really hope that works and I don't need a doctor's visit. 

/venting session.

Fleeting

On Friday, my boy turns 3.

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Its well known in these parts, that when fall hits, there is ONE, maybe two weekends to see the aspens.  The nights turn colder and suddenly their leaves catch fire and shimmer in the wind like a million shiny gold coins and then POOF.  They're gone. 

This weekend was THE weekend and we went up on Saturday to marvel at the fleeting brilliance.  One bright moment in time that can't truly be captured or saved.  All you can really do is be present and immerse yourself in the beauty of now...because tomorrow may be it's own version of beautiful  but it will never be This again.

New Beginnings

First week in my new position at work.  New co-workers, new building, new desk.  New supervisor, new duties.

On my first morning, yesterday, there was a large bouquet of fall flowers on my desk and they brought bagels and fruit for a welcome breakfast.  It made me feel really welcome.

But now I feel like by 2 pm, after being bombarded with new information for hours, my brain is officially off duty for the day.  Its all I can do to point my bleary eyes somewhere in the vicinity of my supervisor's face and at least pretend I know what the hell she is trying to tell me.

This is going to be a good change, I can tell, but right now, its a little overwhelming.

I am exhausted.

34 before 34

I think I mentioned that my 33rd (otherwise known as "Jesus") birthday was a couple weeks ago.  Since then, I've been thinking about what my goals are for the coming year...what things do I want to complete before 34?  Some of these are Big Ones...some are small, but most are doable. There are a few that might be a stretch but sometimes just saying/writing things down plants a seed that eventually grows up into awesome.

1.  Run a half-marathon.  My goal is the July 4th half in my hometown next summer. Done!  Ran the Horsetooth Half-Marathon in Fort Collins, CO in April 2011.  2:03!!
2.  Journal (more) regularly with an actual paper and pen.
3.  Organize family photos.  Ugh.  Bane of my existence.  I am so NOT a scrapbooker.  Its all I can do to make sure everything is uploaded to a photo site and prints dumped in a shoebox.
4.  Try mountain biking.   Done!  2 girlfriends took me up with the Husband's old bike last night.  We did 6 miles of rocky trails at twilight.  It was brutal but awesome.  My wrists and ass are freakin' sore.
5. Run a 10K - Registered for one at the end of the month in MO with my dad.  Done!  But not in MO- did it in hot, humid TX instead.  52:35!!
6. Organize Otto's artwork by age.  I got an accordion folder and labled sections "Age 1, Age 2," etc.  It will work for now and it forces me to do some triage and only keep the really awesome stuff.
7.  Get a new job.  Done!  I start my new position on Monday.  A promotion/transfer that has me both nervous and excited. 
8.  Start knitting again.  I need socks!  And there's a felted slipper pattern that has my eye...
9.  Learn at least 5 new songs on the ukulele.
10.  Take a road trip to visit a friend.
11.  Snowshoe at least once this winter.   Went snowshoeing a handful of times and even tried back country skiing.  (Not my deal, but at least I tried it!)

12.  Brush the dog at least once a week.  Poor thing, she gets so matted.  We're doing pretty well on this front.  We got her shaved in April and so far, so good!
13.  Get a massage.
14.  Go on more dates with the Husband...once a week seems hard but maybe once a month?  We're really trying to take more time for eachother and we took our first weekend away from the kiddo over Memorial Day.  It was glorious!
15. Purchase and learn new piano music.
16.  Learn how to (really) swim.  I can tread water and dog paddle but I want to learn how to really swim so that maybe I can
17.  Try a Triathlon.  Seems a little out there right now (given #16) but a sprint tri might be doable...just putting the idea out there for myself.
18.  Buy hard copies of the Hunger Games trilogy to save for when Otto is old enough to read them. 
19.  Watch Dr. Zhivago again because my mother insists that I should love it. 
20.  Keep moving towards eating homemade/ local foods.  We're doing well so far: local farm eggs, local honey, making our own bread...
21.  Run the Warrior Dash.  How fun does that look!?!
22.  Buy a small deep freezer.  (Probably used.)  For storing local beef/bison!
23.  Start a charity giving family tradition at Holidays time.  I want to start doing something yearly with our family where we together choose a charity and together shop/find items.
24. Actually prepare and cook a whole chicken.  I know!  I've actually never done this...we always just get boneless/skinless chicken breast.  But I want to learn the art of a simple roast chicken and explore all the things you can do with it.
25.  Attend more yoga classes.  I do yoga at home fairly regularly but the classes provide benefits beyond what I can do at home.  And they are fun!
26.  Organize my kitchen cupboards.  Aaaaaarrrrrggggghhhh.
27.  Meditate for at least 5 minutes a day. 
28.  Take Otto to the children's museum and the zoo in Denver.
29.  Visit my little brother and soon to be born niece/nephew in Hawaii.  Hey, a girl can dream!
30.  Start Otto on beginning piano lessons.  Taught by me! 
31.  Have a garage sale.  Might be too late for this year, but next spring I know we'll be ready to unload some "treasures."  Just slid in under the wire!
32.  Go to a major league baseball game.  I'm not a huge fan, but Otto and the Husband would have a wonderful time.
33.  Try Zumba!  This scares me but I want to give it a shot...if only to do something outside my comfort zone.
34.  Sleep more.  Goal is 7-8 hrs. a night.  I'm actually doing pretty good with this one.  One day (night) at a time.