Tuesday, March 31, 2009

The one where I complain but ultimately decide to change nothing

Ok. I'm utterly and completely labeling myself as a nerd here (like I haven't before...heh) But. You know in the Lord of the Rings movie where Bilbo is all "I feel like too little butter spread over too much bread?"

(And then Gandalf is all "OMG I am a huge wizard and will totally get your back, cuz! And I'll steal your ring and your nephew and save the world all while rocking a smokin' zztop beard and getting high on shire weed"...But I digress.)

Well, I feel like Bilbo. I'm over extended and starting to feel the strain. But its not so much in my "real life"- its online.

I feel spread too thin: My$pace, Faceb0ok, Twitter, Blogger, message boards, regular, old-fashioned Hotmail.. BLARGH! I think I may have just spontaneously combusted overworked brains all over my keyboard.

Am I in a class by myself? Or are others feeling the cyber drain? I know that there are people who are on double the number of sites I am, triple...how do they do it without going the Internet version of looney tunes??

The obvious solution would be to cut back- trim the fat and cut down on the sites I actively check. But the reality is that different people communicate with me on these different sites. My$pace is for my rock n' roll buddies- the group of us that connected over the husband's band and the local punk rock scene. This is the only online means I have of communicating with this crowd. Yeah, I have phone numbers for most of them but to send out a mass party invite, for instance, My$pace is the way to go.

Faceb0ok has extended family, friends, high school acquaintances (that for some reason "friend" me when we maybe spoke two words to each other in H.S., if that? Anyway.) Faceb0ok is also how my crafting buddies and I communicate- how we schedule knitting/beer drinking nights, share crafty links, etc.

Hotmail, obviously, is out of the question- I've had my email address FOREVER (well, 13 years?) and that's how I, you know, email people. Like my mom and congresspeople and stuff.

And Twitter is awesome. Period. And I don't really want to give up my blog...Among other things, blogging connects me to others in a way that the "networking" sites don't and makes me feel like a part of a bigger community. And its got me writing again which ain't no small thang.

So I guess for all my bitching, I'm not really ready to change any of this. I like my online communities. I like the people I'm connected with- both my IRL friends and my online momma/crafter/blogger buddies. I suppose I could cut back on how often I check these sites- My$pace on Tues/Thurs, Faceb0ok on Mon/Wed...but really, who wants to keep track of that shit?

Is there some magic solution I'm missing? A widget unicorn that will fantastically change my life forever? Maybe I just need to find myself a great big ol' bearded wizard and some cyber-shireweed...

Friday, March 27, 2009

Absolutely NOT a Waste of Time

Thanks to The Blogess, I've come across this fabulous site. Enjoy my first creation. And if you know me at all, you know that this is probably not work safe. Heh.

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

SMILE! You're on the Internet!

Any regular reader of this here blog knows that I'm not a spiritual or religious person. I don't really believe in G0d and I tend to trust scientific explanations first and foremost, well, behind those of my dad, Meatloaf and Star Wars. (Really, is there any spiritual dilemma Yoda DOESN'T have the answer for??)

In all seriousness, I do, however, tend to believe in energy...the best way I can think to explain this is that I believe that the energy you put out into the universe comes back to you. Like a boomerang. Or dog poop that won't ever truly be cleaned off the bottom of your shoe, depending.

(An aside: I took this test recently and got 100% Secular Humanism followed by 95% Unitarian Universalist and 92% Liberal Quaker. Interesting.)

Rebecca over at Girls Gone Child recently posted about optimism and perpetuating hope on the Internet. She's right in that negativity is rampant...people (yours truly included) have a tendency to use blogs/facebook/twitter etc. as their own personal emotional dumping grounds. Having a shitty day? Tweet it! Pissed about something? Change your facebook status! We're all guilty of it. And misery loves company, non?

The problem is that generally, shitty moods are contagious. Negativity is like pink eye...unchecked, it will run rampant, blithely infecting all who cross its path. But so is happiness. Optimism. Hope. Whatever you want to call it... Positivity. That can be infectious too.

I'm assuredly guilty of crapping all over the Internet...we all have our moments. And I do not think that you should just put on a happy June Cleaver face because really- it can help people to see/hear/read that others are in the same boat...that everyone struggles with bad moods, money woes, crabby kids, whathaveyou. And reading about others' challenges can be a real boon- the stay-at-home mom who struggles with PPD can find a support network online, etc. The Internet should not be all roses and sunshine and cute little bunnies.

BUT. What does it hurt to share good news? Smiles? Happy thoughts? Nuthin, that's what. Rebecca has a great point.

What do you think?

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In the spirit of this post, check THIS out. :) Awesome.

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

You know...

...I am in the best mood. We're having a cold snap so the weather is not particularly nice, we're totally freaking broke due to stupid medical bills, and my job is boring as ever but DAMN if I'm not just happy as a pig in shit.

The only thing I can attribute this to is something that I have been decidedly hesitant about mentioning due to my extreme fear of JINXING it: The little O man has been sleeping through the night. For two weeks.

OMFG, y'all. It only took 18 months. Can I get a HALLELUJAH!

I know that there will be regressions...it is inevitable. But the fact that he is sleeping is so delicious, so delectable, so luxurious that it has kind of gone to my head. I think I look younger. My clothes fit better. The world is shinier and food tastes awesome-er. My energy level is through the roof.

Future be damned, I'm enjoying it right now.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Observations. In List Form. With Links. Don't Ever Say I Don't Deliver.

1. This weekend was so fracking beautiful, it was hard to go indoors for any reason. 60's, sunny, no wind...bliss.

Today, the shit is hitting the fan. And by shit, I mean snow. Boo. Its always like this in March but that doesn't make it suck any less.

2. I am a huge freaking dork and bought and watched the Twilight DVD this weekend. And enjoyed it. A lot. I am now suddenly wanting to move to the Pacific Northwest and become a reclusive author because OMG it looks so beautiful there.

3. I also took myself on a date to see I Love You, Man. Some thoughts:
* I totally heart Jason Segal.
* This movie had some of the most awkward moments I've ever sat through in a film. Some of the scenes were so uncomfortable, I had to look away from the screen.
* BUT- it was very funny. Not Knocked Up or Forgetting Sarah Marshall funny but it was definitely worth the bike ride and purchase of $2.50 milk duds. And really, getting to enjoy the recently mentioned milk duds in the dark theater by myself would have been worth sitting through a much crappier movie.

4. Hahahaha.

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Cars. (Not the Pixar Film.)

One of my all-time favorite bloggers, Cecily of Uppercase Woman, posted yesterday about her first car and so of course I had to copycat because that is the sincerest form of flattery and/or laziness at coming up with my own blogging topic. Ahem.

My first car (the first car that was considered to be mine) was a 1970 something Subaru, not unlike this:


Mine was blue. And not this fancy. But same basic idea. It is what I graduated to after initially learning to drive on my parents ENORMOUS green suburban. In point of fact, I failed my first driving test because I was not able to properly parallel park the thing. Which, did I mention, was ENORMOUS?

Anyway, I eventually got my license and after 6 months or so of driving the family suburban with no accidents, my dad found the Subaru in a used lot for something like $300. I thought it was the coolest thing I had ever seen. The seats were vinyl. There was a tape deck. Life was good.

Unfortunately, it was also stick shift which meant many white-knuckled, engine-killing, gear-grinding drives for myself and my father. And while the man is an AMAZING high school teacher, he totally freaked when teaching me to drive stick. I'm pretty sure its what turned his hair gray. My mom, the infinitely patient kindergarten teacher eventually took over and I learned to love standard. So much control! I felt like a total badass.

I went all over our little town in the blue Subaru. School, various after school jobs, my best friend Rob's house. Weekends, Rob and I would take off to the next town over- Janis Joplin cranked up over the noise of the engine and the roar of the wind from the open windows, chain-smoking Camel lights and singing at the top of our lungs.

I hit a cat once, in that car. It was late at night, complete with pitch-black darkness on the Wyoming highway. Rob and I were returning from a concert in Riverton and zooming along towards home when we heard and felt the KACHUNK KACHUNK. Rob got out to see what I'd hit- I was too chicken. A cat, he reported. We thought about knocking on the door of the nearest ranch house, to see if it was theirs but it was the middle of the night and knocking on random doors in the middle of nowhere at 1:00am didn't seem like the brightest idea. So Rob moved the cat to the side of the road and we continued on in silence, our cigarettes glowing orange in the darkness.

Funny thing, I don't really remember what happened to that car. I think it just got worn out after a while. It fought the good fight but at some point it required repairs that would be more then they were worth. I replaced it with a 1970 something BMW, banana yellow, which I promptly wrecked. After that it was a silver 1980 something Subaru station wagon, named Lucy. (At this point, I started naming my automobiles.) After Lucy came Bonanza Jellybean, the purple Ford Escort. And then my current newish ride- the Silver 2002 Subaru Forrester of recent aquisition. I have named him Stevesie (if you're a Wes Anderson fan, you get it) but Otto prefers Beep Beep Car.

I guess I'm a Subaru girl at heart and the little blue one started it all. Thanks, Cecily, for the ride down memory lane.

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Better Know My District

I didn't vote for her. But she held her own. Sort of.

Eating While Female.

First, go check out this post at Bitch PhD. And read the comments. It is a fabulous discussion of an issue that any woman and many men, I'm sure, can relate to. Go 'head. I'll wait.

Done? Good.

I think that Eating While Female can definitely be hazardous to anyone's sanity- especially in an office like mine where no matter what your body size or what is on your plate, people feel free to offer any and all kinds of commentary on whether you are "good" or "bad" or "thin" or "losing weight" or "being healthy"...It's completely ridiculous.

If people see me eating veggies or fruit, the comments are usually along the lines of "oh, you're so good! I wish I could be that good! I just ate PIZZA!!" Oh the horror.

If I'm eating, say a cookie, the comments are usually "oh I wish I could have a cookie! That looks so yummy! But I have to be good, you know chuckle chuckle...my ASS is so HUGE (insert pause where they wait for you to vehemently deny this)"

Completely fracking ridiculous. What gives us the impression that it is completely ok and acceptable to pseudo-competitively comment on what other women choose to put in their bodies?

Thoughts?

Monday, March 9, 2009

Hungry

Otto's first word this morning:

"Toast?"

* * * * * * * * * * * * *

In other news, we had a great weekend (which was, of course, way too short). The husband's band had a show Friday night, so I had the house to myself after I went to bed. Did an oil treatment on my hair and watched a movie.

Saturday we slept in, piddled around the house and then I had a La Leche League leader's meeting (I know! I'm becoming a leader. I'm either totally awesome or certifiably insane). Saturday night we had to party down with some folks which left me with only yesterday to try to get the house in order while the husband spent all day getting tattooed. (Does this seem fair to you?!? )

A good weekend, but I want more. When I got into work today, I took a look at my available leave and I have more than I thought I did. So I'm going to treat myself to a 4-day weekend. Its spring break next week so work will be DEAD. Don't think I'll be missed. And two days to myself? Heaven.

Whee!

Friday, March 6, 2009

Fraught with Fecundity

I don't know if its spring fever or the fact that my kid has started to finally sleep through the night (so, therefore, I have too) or the phase of the moon or what, but lately I feel like my brain is crammed full of shit I want to get done. Projects to start, books to read, recipes to try...

And this stupid thing called A Day Job keeps getting in the fucking way of my dreams.

I think that once daylight savings time hits, the days will feel longer due to the extended sunlight and that might help a little. But right now I am reading 4 books, knitting my second pair of socks (try not to look so shocked, Mackenzie ;), designing my garden in my head, and mentally decluttering my basement.

I also have grand ideas of writing more, and art projects that may be eventually destined for Etsy.

Now that I think of it, I wonder if this fire under my ass has anything to do with my steadily increasing daily caffeine intake...

Thursday, March 5, 2009

Ba dunk a dunk

Despite my best efforts, losing weight is proving to be difficult. Really, I suspect that it is because I am still breastfeeding- Its like my body just wants to cling on to that layer of fat as an insurance policy. Also, my workouts have been thwarted this week by what I suspect is a sinus/ear infection. Boo.

But I am noticing that my arms are a bit firmer, my legs a bit more shapely and overall I am feeling pretty fit. But the numbers on the scale are proving to be very stubborn and my post baby tummy is just chillin' -apparently oblivious that I am shouting LAST CALL with every crunch, sit up and leg raise I do. Also my ass. It is large.

So onwards and upwards, I say! I'm not giving up and the onset of warmer climes and longer days will make exercising out of doors more of a possibility. And really I suspect that rather than upping my activity I should really be looking at the girl scout cookies and garlic bread I can't seem to stay away from lately. Ahem.