Gobble!

This year I'm thankful for so many things...

-a healthy, beautiful family
- my job, i.e.
-a roof over my head, food in my fridge
-friends, both IRL and internet alike

And all the other little things that make life great ...hot tea, warm baths, snuggles on the couch, unconditional love of pets, sunshine, good books, laughter, long walks, kisses, starry night skies......

Happy Turkey Day!

Just for fun

Its Friday!

Here's a laugh just for you. Zack Galifinakis is one of the funniest people out there and his talk show, Between Two Ferns is completely, totally, 100% awesome.

Special guest on this episode is Natalie Portman. Enjoy.

Between Two Ferns With Zach Galifianakis from Between Two Ferns

Calm as a Cucumber. On Speed.

The insurance company my employer contacts with really likes to pretend that they are very interested in our health and well-being. (Or maybe its genuine?...Hahaha! That's a great one!) Its quite humorous, really, how they dupe us into taking online 'health risk assessments' and send us friendly little post-cards with titles like "IT'S COLONOSCOPY TIME!! and "WHEN WAS YOUR LAST MAMMOGRAM? YOU'RE BOOBS WANT TO KNOW!!!" (Ok, I made that last one up. But you get the message.)

Anyway, said company are running this program where if you go online and take one of these so-called 'health assessment questionnaires' they will send you $50. They did the same thing 2 years ago and it was pretty harmless. And that $50 check was sweet. So the other day, I cleared 15 minutes and went out and entered my height, weight, drinking habits, etc. to get my free money, bitch!

Yesterday they called me ("This call may be recorded for quality assurance purposes!") to invite me to participate in an exciting new program to help manage stress.

You see, they figured I needed this program based on my answers to the online health risk assessment I completed recently. The results show that I am at moderate to severe risk of stress. (YOU DON'T SAY!) Was I interested, the velvet voiced woman asked, in having 24 hour access to a nursing help line, doing small assignments and talking with a stress management adviser over the phone periodically?

"NO!," I graciously bellowed. "That just sounds stressful! I don't need any more time constraints on my life!"

Those health risk assessments are OBVIOUSLY crap. Heh.

Hold Me Closer, Tiny Thanksgiving

Every year we go to the husband's aunt's house for Thanksgiving. I don't mind, really. His family is close- mine is far away. They drink alcohol and tell poop jokes. My mom would faint at the thought. They DON'T watch football which is awesome. It works.

But.

The food? The food is good, don't get me wrong, but you know how when you are growing up the things you have at Thanksgiving just become, in your mind, what Thanksgiving IS? They just don't have those things that ARE Thanksgiving to me. They have their own things. The things they grew up with.

Examples:

My family menu growing up had a very southern influence:

-Turkey (of course) usually cooked with big thick bacon strips carefully laid over top which simultaneously baste the bird in succulent pork fat and fill the house with the best smell in the world...BACON,

-Cornbread DRESSING (crispy and cooked in its own pan-NEVER stuffed in the bird. Gross),

-creamy mashed potatoes with turkey gravy

-Candied yams with marshmallows (hello DELICIOUS),

-white dinner rolls,

-green beans with almonds and/or green bean casserole (you know, with the french fried onions?),

-and finally, pumpkin AND apple pie.

It may appear to be a little WT but its what we did. Its what I grew up with. Its what I came to think of as Thanksgiving.

The husband's family is Italian. They do things differently. AS IS THEIR RIGHT:

-Salami stuffing INSIDE the bird,

-antipasto,

-corn casserole,

-sweet potato rolls with RAISINS in them (really, WTF),

-pecan pie.

Its not that bad (in fact, I'm sure some of you think it sounds infinitely better), but I'm always left unsatisfied, as though I haven't really had the TRUE cuisine of the holiday. I need my bacon fat and brown sugar, people.

So this year, I'm making my own mini Thanksgiving meal, just for our family. Tomorrow. I'm calling it Tiny Thanksgiving and I'm goin' all out. I'm making all the stuff we had when I was a kid- the dressing, the bacon-y bird, the marshmallows...the whole 9 yards. Maybe this way, I'll achieve a sense of satisfaction this year...a feeling that YES. I experienced Thanksgiving.

I'll also probably gain 5 lbs or so but that bacon basted bird is SO worth it. Believe that.


Question:

What things did you have for Thanksgiving when you were a kid? Do tell.

A day late...

My brother served in Iraq for the airforce. Thanks to him and all veterans who do what they think is right in the service of the US.

Today is the day!

Well, I hope it is. Otto has an appointment with the orthopaedist this morning to hopefully get his splint off. I'm sick of dealing with it so I can only imagine how he must feel. Although, come to think of it, he really doesn't seem that bothered. He just kind of gets by using his left hand for most things and never complains. Wow. My kid is kind of awesome.

(I'm sure I would be bitching and moaning and pitching a general fit pretty much every day if I wasn't allowed to use my right arm. However, I guess I am called upon to do things he isn't like type, cook, clean, wash my own hair, wipe my own ass, etc. But then again, he DOES do things like put toys in my purse, pull the cat's tail and clap wildly after singing the ABC's and/or repeating the "F" word*...so I guess its a tie.)

Anyhoo, we're ready for the damn thing to come off regardless. And a mid-morning's doctor appointment for something like this is a great excuse to get out into the sunshine and just maybe stop at the good coffee place on the way. :)

Us in the ER after being fixed up. You can't see it but his shirt said "I do my own stunts". Yeah.

* * * * * * * * * *

In other news, it feels like things are beginning to equalize a little bit. The puppy is starting to get into the swing of things- she still has puppy moments, of course- but she is generally calmer and better behaved than she was 2 weeks ago. Also, she starts puppy kindergarten tonight (I KNOW! OMG THE CUTE!!) which should just further our obedience training efforts.

After a bout of illness this weekend, the Husband seems to be returning to his normal, pithy self which I am glad to see. It's no small thing either that we have had nice weather for the past week: Sunshine and temps into the 60's. We are getting a teensy tiny taste of fall after having all that snow and we likes it, precious.




*Yeah, Otto repeats a swear word from time to time and thinks he is pretty funny doing it. We're trying to be better about the sailor language in his presence but it is HARD, folks.

By a thread

Today is rough.

This song is one of the only things getting me through.



That and my sweet little kid:



Oh, and a half-caff latte and M & M's. Don't judge me.

Halloweiner

For people that really didn't do all that much, we had a great Halloween. Otto went as his dad, complete with beard and tattoos (on the non-splinted arm, at least).

Here he is eating the one treat I let him have out of his pumpkin. Chocolate bar at 8pm = PARENTING ROOKIE FAIL.


And here he is about an hour before, trick or treating in the snow. Don't be alarmed that he didn't have a hat on or anything- we went to about 5 houses, all on our street and it was warmer than it looks. That or we're looking at another parenting FAIL of the night. You be the judge.



And here is my hastily compiled "Beer Wench" costume, complete with frothy mug. Which I chugged right after this picture was taken. Just kidding. Sort of.

How was your Halloween??